One Week Down, Rest of Life to Go

It has been a week of ups and downs. I've met hundreds of people but only know the names of a couple of dozen or so and even then I more or less only know their names and what they are studying. My ability to cultivate friendship from this type of situation has never really been one that I've had to call upon as is the case with hundreds of fellow fresher's. Never has there been a room full of complete strangers from different parts of Scotland and beyond, where you simply start from scratch. It's nice to have the occasional familiar face but a phrase that I have coined this week is "it's nice to see some unfamiliar faces" - not something that you would usually think makes sense but the logic is there as far as I'm concerned. I guess that the hardest part of this week has been that aspect of things. As far as I'm concerned, I'm not an introvert: shy on occasion yes, but not particularly an introvert. Having said that, I am not a particularly confident person when placed in this type of situation. The best part about this week for me is the fact that I've not really had any other choice than to try and put myself out there a bit because if I hadn't then the next few weeks and months could have been a lot more difficult. Now those unfamiliar faces have slowly started to become familiar which will make the first week of lectures and the next few weeks of staying in halls that bit easier. 

Now I suppose is the time when I should really break the bad news to you all - fresher's week hasn't lived up to what I thought it would be; and it's not just me that feels this way either. I've spoken to countless people that have been having early nights and have avoided alcohol on particular evenings. I suppose if you asked the people in my flats how they felt fresher's week was then the majority would say it was "amazing" or "awesome" or even "the best week of their lives". Don't get me wrong, I've had a fantastic week but I've had my fair share of feeling down and out this week. I suppose that you are probably thinking that I've not made the most of fresher's week and that I should have been out doing more things because I will agree that they way I am describing it makes it sound like I've sat in my room staring at the walls every day. This is not the case because I have been out and about with people doing lots of different and fun things but when it really came down to it, it just wasn't what I expected it to be. I see all of these pictures of people in my position at Edinburgh and other universities and they look like they are having the time of their lives but I guess that a combination of trying to settle (despite being fairly close to home) and meeting all of these new people has made this week more difficult for me than I could have imagined.

I think that it is time I saved myself from a bottomless pit of despair (well not really because believe it or not, I have been a pretty happy person for most of the week) and tell you what my favourite things about this week were. For one the feeling of looking after myself is something that I've looked forward to for a long time. A challenge yes, but nevertheless something that I relish the thought of. As well as that I have enjoyed meeting new people from all parts of the world which is never really something that happens in high school. My favourite part of the week though has to be the prospect of starting my law degree. This week has come and gone now and it is time to do what I really came here for - to study law at one of the best universities in the world. Call me sad but I can't wait for my first lecture and the first time I do work in the library or the first case I'm asked to read. Things like that excite me for whatever reason and I'll be damned if that's going to stop just at the brink of the next chapter in my life (I've said that a lot in recent posts but it's the most apt way to describe it I think).

I'm aware that there is the chance that there could be people reading this that I have only just met this week and who don't really know anything about me. I can assure you that although I sound like a melancholic teenager, I really am a very happy guy who certainly knows how to smile once in a while. I don't need to tell you that in fact because you'll soon come to learn that under my shy and serious exterior is someone completely different.

I usually try to slip in a few jokes in my posts as you all know but I don't really have any that are particularly topical which is a bit crap. Instead I'll end with this: fresher's week was great fun and I will always look back on this week as being a good solid start to university life but the real thing starts next week and that's when I'll get my mojo back - just you wait and see...

You guys rock for reading as per usual so thanks,


Martin